How to Find and Measure Her Engagement Ring Size (Without Her Knowing)

November 13th, 2020

Need help figuring out your significant other’s finger size? We’ve got you covered. Here are some helpful tips to determine a ring size without her knowing or him knowing to really surprise them with an engagement ring!

So, you’re ready to ask your significant other to marry you and you’re all set to purchase an engagement ring. Congrats! That’s incredibly exciting. But you don’t know his or her ring size? Yikes. Here are some quick and handy tips to figuring out his or her finger size.

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Ask a friend
Friends talk. A lot of times friends talk about fashion, boys, girls, needs, wants, and you guessed it, rings! This is especially true if your significant other is hoping for and expecting an upcoming proposal. Sometimes, your significant other can be quite smart and strategic. It is quite possible that they know that you DON’T know their finger size. So what do they do? They plant hints with friends. There’s one downside to asking a friend. Trust. If you’re trying to keep the upcoming proposal and engagement a surprise, then you’re going to want to make sure you trust this friend. Stay away from the blabbering friends and stick to the friends who are tight-lipped.


Ask a family member
The same basic principles apply here as they do above. A lot of times a mother, brother, or sister have some good intel. If you’re comfortable doing so, ask one of them. Here’s a pro tip, if you KNOW that they’ve gone ring shopping then figure out who they’ve gone ring shopping with. It’s a good bet that if they’ve gone ring shopping then he or she has had their finger sized.


Ask a jeweler
If you know that your significant other has gone ring shopping, then you have a good chance of uncovering her ring size. If you can’t figure out his or her finger size from whomever she went shopping with then figure out WHERE he or she went to look at rings. Most likely, he or she went to a jeweler to look. Try calling around and figuring out where they went. A lot of times, jewelers keep good notes on these things (especially better jewelers). Calling your local jewelers may not be a bad idea in any case. Not only can you potentially discover what finger size she is, but you can potentially discover what type of ring she likes! Jewelers will typically notate if your significant other likes white gold, yellow gold, rose gold, a diamond halo ring, precious stones, and the list goes on.


Find a current ring (that she wears on her ring finger)
Does your boyfriend or girlfriend currently wear rings? If so, you can hunt down one of her rings and bring it to a jeweler to figure out her finger size. If you’re trying to keep the upcoming engagement a secret, you’re going to have to be sneaky. Make sure she doesn’t discover that you snagged one of her rings. Our best recommendation is to return the ring as quickly as you can. There are a few really important things to be mindful of here.

  • Make sure it’s a ring he/she actually wears. If you’re sizing a ring that he/she doesn’t wear it’s pointless and will probably render the wrong size.
  • Make sure it’s a ring that’s actually worn on the ring finger. It’s also pointless to size a ring that he/she wears on the wrong finger. As a rule of thumb, most people wear their engagement ring on the fourth finger (ring finger) of the left hand. You can still size a ring that he/she wears on her right-hand ring finger but note that most people’s right-hand finger is slightly larger than the left. We would recommend adjusting half a size for the difference. Please see the following finger guide for reference:
Ring Size Illustration

Find a current ring (that she DOESN’T wear on her ring finger)
This can be tricky, but we’ve seen it work. If you can’t seem to find a ring that she wears on either of her ring fingers, then look for other rings. Ideally you’ll want to find a ring that she wears on one of her middle fingers. Bring that ring to the jeweler and let them know that she wears it on her middle finger. This will give the jeweler some sort of benchmark to work from.


Pinterest and Instagram
This is a great resource, especially for discovering what styles he or she likes. Many people hoping to get engaged dream about and research what types of engagement rings they like. Pinterest and Instagram are incredible resources for high quality photos. Pull out your investigative skills again and start hunting. Sometimes there will be notes or hints for not only what style ring he/she likes, but also what his or her finger size is.


Guess at it
You will need a professional to help with this. First, you will need to download a few clear photos of your boyfriend or girlfriends’ hand. You can find these on your phone, Facebook, or Instagram. Creepy? A little. Effective? Possibly.

If you have a relationship with a jeweler, ask them to look at the photo of his or her hand. Someone who sizes a lot of rings can probably guess reasonably well within a size or so. We would only recommend this option as a last-ditch effort, though. If you need a referral to a reputable jeweler in your area just reach out to BriteCo and we can guide you.


Ask your significant other
When all else fails just ask. Obviously, if you’re trying to keep your upcoming engagement a secret this won’t work. But if you’re open to discussion simply ask him or her what their finger size is. If you’re really good and thinking way ahead, ask this question and jot it down somewhere you won’t forget.

When in doubt, always err on the larger size. There’s nothing worse than getting down on one knee, proposing, getting the big “YES,” and then not being able to slip the ring on the finger. There are lots of tips and tricks for temporarily making a ring smaller, but there’s absolutely nothing you can do to make a ring larger. We hope this helps and a big CONGRATULATIONS! 🎉

Also Check:

5 tips for planning the perfect proposal
How Soon is Too Soon to Propose | BriteCo Jewelry Insurance
How to Get a Ring Off a Swollen Knuckle: Save Your Hand and Your Jewelry
Is He Going To Propose? | BriteCo Jewelry Insurance
Ring Appraisals Most Common FAQs

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Dustin Sitar, MBA - Director of Marketing and Operations

About the Author

Dustin Sitar is the Director of Marketing and Operations at BriteCo dedicated to consistently serving and motivating customers through education and inspiration. Prior to joining BriteCo, Dustin was a Senior Analyst on the Merchandising Strategy team at Zappos.com focused on bringing new products to the market. He holds an MBA in Finance from the W.P. Carey School of Business.